How to be a darknet drug lord

11 months ago · 1 comments

Wow, who knew how difficult it was to be a criminal? Found via HN.

You’re an aspiring drug kingpin. Go out and pay money for another computer. It doesn’t have to be the best or most expensive. Still, it needs to be able to run Linux. Don’t lord over your new onion empire from your mother’s basement or any location normally associated with you for your additional safety. Leave your phone behind when you head out to manage your enterprise, so you aren’t tracked by cell towers. Last but not least, for this paragraph, don’t debate the same subjects across identities and take counter-measures to alter your writing style.


Disinformation is critical to your continued freedom. Give barium meat tests to your contacts liberally. It doesn’t matter if they realize they’re being tested. You inject fraudulent details about yourself and your life if you're caught making small talk. You don’t want to be like Ernest Lehmitz, a German spy who sent otherwise boring letters about himself containing hidden writing about ship movements during World War II. He got caught because the non-secret portion of his letters gave up various minor personal details the FBI correlated and used to find him after intercepting just 12 letters. Spreading disinformation about yourself takes time, but the tapestry of deceptions will practically weave after a while.

Takeaway: If you rely only on tor to protect yourself, you will

get owned, and people like me will laugh at you. Remember that someone is always watching and knows when to step away. Do try to stay safe while disobeying the law. In the words of Sam Spade, “Victory to crime!”

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